Grief
by Beximus
Summary: Catherine needs help to cope with everything that's happened to her. GC


Grief.

By Bec.

Rating PG

Spoilers:  Lady Heather's Box.

Disclaimers:  These guys aren't mine to do anything permanent with, I just play.

Archive:  The Graveyard Shift.  Come visit us.

This is the first songfic that I have ever attempted.  I never really used to like them, but all of the ones I've read lately on this list have been so good they have convinced me to try.  So here goes, I hope you like.

Eleven days,  
A dozen nights,   
A thousand tears,  
And you are my shoulder.  
From summer's haze, on morning light,  
The sun is rising...Just like I told you.

He walked out through the house to the garden where she stood, the dark of night setting in and she almost merged in with the background making it difficult to see her.  But he knew she was there.  He would have known no matter what.

This last couple of weeks he had been unavailable.  Work had been piling up, there had been some really big cases to investigate.  She had needed him, and he had not seen it.  He had offered to go to the funeral with her, but she had told him that it was better if he did not.  And he stayed away ever since.  When she had been short with him earlier at him, he suddenly realised and he knew he could never forgive himself for being so insensitive about her grief.  He had always made himself available to her no matter what.  Lately, he had been shutting himself off on purpose

He paused before walking to her.  He could hear her sobbing.  He knew that no matter what he felt, no matter how deeply he cared for her, or how much he thought about work, he had to be there for her now.  He had to give her everything she needed from him to get through this.  She was crumbling inside, all of her control had slipped and she could not hold it in anymore.

  
 If you fall, I'll never let your spirit break,  
If you call, I'll always soothe the cries you make,  
If it's all I can do, I'll slowly kiss your dreams awake  
You're not alone for heaven's sake,  
Mercury rising

He came up behind her, ready to take all the pain away, but unsure of whether to wait, or wrap his arms around her, to hold her.  After his ignorance, he did not know if he would be welcome.  He stood so close, he could feel her shaking, feel her grief, and his eyes filled with tears of his own.

He swallowed, and pulled her to him, ready for her as she turned in his arms, and she held on to him as if her life depended on it.  They may have been divorced, may have had bitterness, but he knew that Catherine still had feelings for Eddie, not intense, but the love never completely disappeared.  He knew that.  He knew his own love for her had never disappeared either.  But he did not deserve such a wonderful woman.  But she needed him.

"It'll be alright, Catherine.  It will.  I promise."  He bent his head and gently pressed his lips to her hair, trying to convey some strength that he did not feel.  He held her and whispered to her as she began to quieten down, her sobs became mere tears.

  
From winter skies,  
A cold embrace -  
The shadows meet,  
And they drag you under...  
The moonlight's mine  
And yours to chase -  
Your star is rising,  
Beyond your wonder...

"I never thought it would hurt so much," she managed speaking into his shirt.

"I suppose our emotions always surprise us."  He kept her held tightly to him, and she made no attempt to get away.

"Do they surprise you?"

"Always."  It was an honest answer.  It always surprised him how much she evoked a response within him.

"He wasn't supposed to die.  He was supposed to stay here.  At least so Lindsey could have her father."

"Right now, everything looks bleak, and you can't see anything in the future.  But it's there, and you'll bounce back from this.  You owe it to him to keep living your life."  He let his arms pull back slightly and she lifted her head, looking at him in the dark for the first time.

"Why should I believe that?"  She sounded sceptical, but he knew that she was just trying to be realistic.

"Because I said it."

  
If you fall, I'll never let your spirit break,  
If you call, I'll always soothe the cries you make,  
If it's all I can do, I'll slowly kiss your dreams awake  
You're not alone for heaven's sake,  
Mercury rising

He took her back into his arms as fresh tears began to fall.  They stayed there for what seemed like hours, she took all of her strength from him as she had none left herself.  She knew it would be alright because he said so.  Because he told her that there would be light at the end, she believed him totally.

  
You're not alone for heaven sake  
Your tears run so freely,  
Your fears run so deeply down...  
The pressure is breaking.  
Quicksilver awaking now...  
Can you feel it rise?  
Can you see it rise?  
Droplets of dreams   
That you touched, disappear...  
There's change in the weather,   
And wind in your hair,  
And Mercury's rising,  
Mercury's rising 

"Thank you, Gil."  She did not want to move, wanted to live inside his arms forever.

"Whenever you need me, I'll be there for you.  Just come and find me."

"You'll never leave me alone will you?"  He could hear the need in her voice, and fear that she would forever be alone, and his heart broke for her, his love.

"Never, my love.  Never."  
  
Eleven days,  
A dozen nights,   
A thousand tears...   
And you are my shoulder.  
From summer's haze, on morning light,  
The sun is rising...  
Just like I told you

The End.

Note:  This song is called Mercury Rising by Darius.  For those of you in America who have no idea who he is, he came third in a show called Pop Idol here in the UK, which is the programme which American Idol came from.  He's tall, Scottish, and absolutely gorgeous J  This is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard, I heard it first last Saturday when I went to see him in concert, and it was amazing.  If you can get to hear a copy, then do.  It's amazing.


End file.
